Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children

I was walking around Crestwood Plaza in St. Louis on Sunday and decided to check out Waldenbooks, which I know sells manga and wall scrolls. While looking through the wall scrolls for a Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children one, I turned to a fellow fan and asked him if he had seen any FFVII: Advent Children merchandise anywhere in the area. He got this weird look and said he hadn’t – the movie wasn’t even released yet. I had to smile at myself for that. I’d forgotten that for most people in North America, their first viewing of Advent Children would be in January 2006, while mine was September 24th 2005 thanks to David)! As lame as the fact is that I remember when I first saw Advent Children, it’s even lamer that as of yet I have not reviewed a movie that I’ve seen 12 times and counting.

I’m going to be up front with this and not even pretend to be an avid role-playing gamer. I only played Final Fantasy VII to understand the movie better. *gasp* What!? Are you not outraged?

Yeah, I decided to toss away a good deal of my time on a video game after seeing a trailer for the movie. David brought it home one day and knowing that my friend absolutely loved these games and was waiting for the movie to come out I invited her over to view it with us. She looked lost in that preview, fascinated. The second preview we saw, I just watched her. What could possibly make anyone look that way about a movie trailer?

I wanted that look, so I asked to borrow the game. I popped it in my PS2 and was totally disappointed by the graphics (I told you I got into gaming later in life – I’ve been spoiled). I’ve never been into these types of games; they bore me. I got irritated trying to figure out how to move and what to do when there was one of many, many battles to fight. I almost gave up and lost interest when I had a gaming epiphany and understood how to play. By the time I got to the demon door guardian, though, I was stuck and needed my friend’s help. Thank god for Big Guard or I would of never beat that guy.

I spent 35 hours of my life shamelessly playing FFVII, only leaving the house like a zombie now and then to get groceries. That game consumed me, but it was worth it. I took a ton of shortcuts and avoided many battles to so I could finish the game by the time David got Final Fantasy VII. Hence why I only spent 35 hours gaming. Robin spent 95 hours playing and her characters were at their max hit/health points of 9999. She let me borrow her guys so I could beat Sephiroth (no way in hell could my guys have ever beat Sephy). It was like using a chainsaw on a stick of butter – Sephiroth was gone in two moves.

The ending to FFVII was impressive for the time, and I really enjoyed the game for itself, and not just as an explanation for a movie. I plan on playing Final Fantasy X soon – that’s how much I liked Final Fantasy VII.

Anyway, the movie was like a wet dream it was so good. The graphics were mind-blowing and the character designs were stunning; so that’s what Cloud looks like in 3D, Tifa was looking good too, and do not get me started on Vincent. This movie was beautiful and spectacular and 100% fan service. It was so fan service it’s not even funny but I didn’t even care.

Apparently many FF fans did care and are very bitter about what they perceive as a lack of a plot. Nuts to you guys! You didn’t get enough story outta the 100+ hours of game play? Come on!! We got to see the whole Final Fantasy gang together in all their fully rendered glory (albeit one fight scene), were introduced to three very well “designed” villains, and we saw some excellent action through out the whole movie. But sheesh…you critics wanted all your nagging little questions answered in this movie so you could sleep better at night.

Were you naysayers actually thinking to yourselves how shallow this all is while Cloud was kicking Summons ass? Shit, go home and cry ta mamma, this movie couldn’t be done any other way. If they answered one question, someone else would bitch, and if they put Aerith/Aries together with Cloud you’d all die in your own bile. Ha, this movie totally knows it’s predictable and makes no bones about it. We so know what’s gonna happen in the first 15 minutes, and so what! I loved it!

Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children takes place two years after Meteor/Holtried to destroy the planet. Midgar is a wreck and the folks living there aren’t so great themselves. The world is a different place without Mako to power it and the people are trying to rebuild the places they once called home using alternative sources of energy. Cloud has a job as a deliveryman working with Tifa and is also helping the orphaned children of Midgar. Someone though (or some ones) is making life miserable for those trying to wipe the memory of Sephiroth and his deeds off the planet. A mysterious shrouded figure from Cloud’s past entreats him to protect his work, eliminating all trace of Sephy, from these evildoers’ mischief. Although Cloud refuses to help, he’s drawn into battle regardless of whether or not this is a fight he wants.

I will admit that the movie may be confusing to some people who haven’t played the game (see that’s why I played the game), but David didn’t have a hard time appreciating it even though he never played it. I will suggest to all you out there who have not played the game to read a synopsis of the plot for the game.

So, Final Fantasy fans could take this movie two ways: unabashed fan service served up with super graphics and delicious character design, or shallow, unfulfilling and utterly not worth the two-year wait. You decide.

out of a possible 4 Kasugai